{"id":27101,"date":"2025-11-24T17:47:04","date_gmt":"2025-11-25T01:47:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/?p=27101"},"modified":"2025-11-25T17:48:04","modified_gmt":"2025-11-26T01:48:04","slug":"former-front-page","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/2025\/11\/24\/former-front-page\/","title":{"rendered":"Former Front Page"},"content":{"rendered":"
\"\"

Photo by Andy Rukes Enhanced with AI<\/p><\/div>\n

I spiral
\nWithout direction
\nNeither up nor down
\nMerely outward
\nWith the universe<\/p>\n

\n<\/blockquote>\n

I’ve thought many times that someday I’d write my autobiography. I also wondered whether or not there was enough to write about.<\/p>\n

After writing a Fringe play about my awakening, for lack of a better word, I realized that, yeah, there’s a lot of stuff that I could write about. I could write books. However, after gathering all my memories and milling them into one simple ingredient: the essence of myself, I saw the play for what it was meant to be, a process. Ironically, for me, the art is in the telling of it.<\/p>\n

As the need to write about what’s important to me grew, I began living more actively. I began seeing my life as a story. Every second. Every one twenty fourth of a second. I am no longer interested in writing about past experiences any more than I am interested in living in the past, however grateful I am for every moment of it.<\/p>\n

I feel resistance while writing these words. Are they important? Am I crazy?<\/p>\n

Regardless, it’s my responsibility. I have unwittingly made myself responsible for painting my life beautiful. And what is beauty, if not to be shared?<\/p>\n

I’m finished trying to make sense of it. I just accept it and in that, I have found peace.<\/p>\n

\n

This morning I was walking along the sea wall. As I passed a couple in mid-conversation I overheard one of them say to the other, “Do you want to hear something really creepy about this guy at the swimming pool?” and I thought of stopping them and saying (a split second too late) “Can you tell me too? Or would that be too creepy?” I thought it was hilarious and felt confident the spirit of the moment would cause everyone to laugh. It’s as much how you say something as what you say. Had I asked, I may have been told the story, I may not. That wasn’t the point for me, the point for me was merely shared levity.<\/p>\n

As I walked away wishing I had said something. I wondered what trajectory that would have put my life on. Momentary friends enjoying a laugh? Recognition? Connection? A cautious, nervous laugh among strangers?<\/p>\n

I mused over the missed opportunity as I approached a couple walking ahead of me. By the time I caught up to them, I decided that I wanted to weave a story around my missed opportunity. After telling them briefly what just happened and how I wanted to write about it, I asked them if I could take their picture to accompany my writing. They agreed and we went our separate ways.<\/p>\n

We are now five strangers connected with a common experience. Some unknowingly.<\/p>\n

Unless, of course, they stumble across this.<\/p>\n

And I think that’s beautiful.<\/p>\n

MY FIRST POST<\/a> | MY RECENT POSTS<\/a><\/h5>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I spiral Without direction Neither up nor down Merely outward With the universe I’ve thought many times that someday I’d write my autobiography. I also wondered whether or not there was enough to write about. After writing a Fringe play about my awakening, for lack of a better word, I realized that, yeah, there’s a Read More …<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"ngg_post_thumbnail":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[28,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-27101","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-all","category-personal"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27101","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=27101"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27101\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":27102,"href":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27101\/revisions\/27102"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=27101"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=27101"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/andyrukes.ca\/greenroom\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=27101"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}